3/22/2024

Today I got my BMX bike back from the repair shop after almost twenty years in storage. I haven't ridden it since I was roughly ten or eleven but it all came back; it felt like flying on the way home. I felt a sense of freedom and daring I thought I'd forgotten about completely. I can't wait to use this daily again since the trains are getting so violent as well as the buses. I'm not paying for that shit if I don't have to anymore.

Today I rode in the street with the cars for the first time too. Before this I thought that would give me a heart attack, but in the moment I felt strangely calmer and more in control than I normally am. I wasn't stupid either of course, I minded my surroundings but I didn't panic. All of this seems like a good sign. Now I'm gonna walk to the Dunkin Donuts for my mom because she's coming back from an MRI and some other medical scans today. I've been craving donuts so I figured I should ask if she'd want one.

I can't bike there sadly because I still need a bike lock and I live in a ghetto where they'd steal my shit in a heartbeat with or without one, but especially without. My hands smell like bike grease and my body is heavy where I can feel all my blood. I haven't done any serious exercise in years so this must be my body asking what the hell is going on.